Solution Focused Therapy in Texas

Solution-Focused Therapy with Mandy Attaway

My method of solution-focused brief therapy (SFBT) is a little different than other therapist's styles. I hold true to the tenets of traditional SFBT. I believe that: 

• If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it 

• If it's working, do more of it 

• If it's not working, it's time to do something different

I also hold to the principles of SBFT which are: 

• Change is always happening and guaranteed to happen.

• You must want things to be better. You're reading this so I know you do!

• You are an expert on you! No one knows you better than you.

• You already have all the resources and strengths you need to solve and overcome any problems or obstacles that come your way. You just might have forgotten them.

• This therapy style is short-term. While rare, one-and-done sessions can and do happen! 

• The emphasis of therapy is on what is possible and what you can change. There's empowerment here!

• The focus of the conversation is on the future. There's no need to talk about the worst day in your life. Let's discuss what you want instead! 

This style of therapy is hope-centered, empowering, and motivating. 

How is Mandy's Approach Different?

How Does Mandy Use the Concept of Superheroes in Session?

We are all somewhat familiar with superheroes. Some of us are huge fans and know all of them, their powers, and their backstories.  Just like these Superheroes from the movies, you have a backstory too. Like the superheroes in the movies, you have faced incredible situations, struggled, suffered during them, and eventually through great effort and new superpowers, you overcame them and have superpowers that you might not realize. How do I know that you overcame them? You survived and are here, reading this. You survived. You are successful, even though you might not feel that way. 

This is one of the reasons I don't ask you how you feel. Feelings are flags that simply alert us to important things in our lives: the bigger the feelings, the bigger the flags, the more important the situation. Feelings are not facts. They are important; however, they come and will eventually go. They are never truly permanent, frequent maybe, but never truly permanent. 

Here are some examples of some clients new found superpowers:

• Being able to read people well and capable of telling if they are lying, hiding something, or being honest. 

• Having courage in the face of challenges.

• The ability to bounce back. 

• Grace in the face of hostility. 

• Resilience against adversity.

• Deep abiding faith and spirituality. 

• Having a hopeful outlook when things are hard. 

• Rock solid problem-solving skills. 

• Effective emotional intelligence. 

• The ability to keep things in perspective. 

•  The ability to motivate others. 

• Kindness. 

• Gentleness. 

• Inspiring leadership. 

• Having a level head. 

• The ability to firmly say, "no," and hold a boundary. 

• Openness with others. 

• Self-control. 

• The ability to maintain long and healthy relationships. 

• Determination. 

• Compassion for others. 

• Self-knowledge and commitment to personal growth. 

• Healthy flexibility.

• Good sense of humor.

• Strong advocacy for others.

This list is really endless. Each person has a unique combination of some of these strengths that makes them unique. A lot of the time, just like the superheroes from the movies, their superpower is related to the struggles that they have overcome. For example, someone who is very kind is kind because, at some time in their life, they were denied the kindness that they needed the most. Once they overcame the obstacle of living through or surviving that cruel or neglectful relationship, they became the kind person to all those around them that they needed most back then. Their superpower is kindness. 

During our session, I am looking for trends in our discussions that might point to your unique superpowers. I know they're there. We just need to find them. 

What kind of questions will Mandy ask me?

SFBT is characterized by its unique way of asking questions. Here are some examples so you will know what to expect: 

• What stopped the problem from happening even if it was only briefly? 

• Tell me about a time when you didn't have to deal with the problem. 

• On a scale of 0-10 how big is this problem? 

• How have you managed this so far? 

• What do you want instead? 

• When was the problem not a problem? 

• If I had a magic wand and could bippity-boppity-boop you your perfect outcome, what would it be? 

The purpose of these questions is to help you envision change. By utilizing visualization techniques and discussing it in detail, what you want instead of the problem can become more tangible, more concrete, and ultimately more accessible. This is kind of like a conversational mind map to help you solve your problems in your own way utilizing your own unique skills, resources, strengths, and your personal superpower all while fortifying your hope and resiliency and empowering you to take the next courageous step.  

Homework: Another way SFBT with Mandy is different.

One of the hallmarks of traditional SFBT is that no homework is assigned. I am a little different. I will often assign you homework. 

Some of the homework is separate from the actual work of therapy. Generally, the worksheets are more cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) based. I give these to you mostly on a for-your-information basis. I do not typically follow up with you about whether or not you have completed them; although, I may ask what you thought of them. If you like them, I may give you more. If you don't, then I probably won't give you more. The contents of these worksheets are meant to help you look at things differently. I have found that my clients will look over the worksheets and come to the next session with some new ideas and new inspiration for how to approach the problem. 

Another form of homework I like to give is what I call thought homework which is meant to help you notice all the ways you are already using your superpower or working towards solving your problem. Again, I firmly believe that you are the superhero of your life story. When clients come to me, they seem to have forgotten this and stop giving themselves credit for all the times they effectively use their superpowers that they deserve. This thought homework usually goes something like this: 

• This week until I see you again next week, I want you to notice all the times when you [something related to whatever the goal of therapy is]. 

• This week I want you to think about [something related to whatever the goal of therapy is]. 

The purpose of this homework is to get you inspired, confident, and empowered. This thought homework also really speeds up the therapeutic process to get you on to living your best life post-therapy sooner! 

How will I know that I am ready to graduate from therapy? 

This is my favorite part - getting you to the point where you are good enough to go on and live your best life on your own! SFBT is known for its quicker-than-average graduation rates. Generally, you will know before I do if you are ready to graduate or take a little vacation from therapy to try things on your own. I frequently check-in and ask, "How's things going? Do you think you'll be ready to graduate soon?" so this topic of graduation is openly discussed and any thoughts from you are very welcomed! The last visit before graduation is spent planning for your post-therapy best life. You can expect questions like: 

• What is your plan to handle this from now on? 

• How will you know when you need support?

• Who will you turn to when you need support? (Name at least 5 people).

• Now that you have conquered this goal, what short-term and long-term goals will you set for yourself?

• What is your plan for self-care going forward? 

Once you have a solid plan for yourself going forward, you are ready to graduate from therapy! Should anything happen that makes you feel like you need to check in or a checkup, you can schedule a free confidential consultation to meet with me when needed. I am also just an email or text away as well!